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05/18/2016

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Amazing insights. When I worked hard and fell into line, I, too pleased my mother. I learned how to please others. I got very good at doing that. Many years later, I am learning to do what I want to do whether it pleases others or not!

Oh,Beth, thanks for sharing this. I am shedding the addiction of suffering for my actions or displeasure of others....it was ingrained as you mentioned by the very religion we grew up in. Sad, but true, criticism and fear of disapproval was the brainwashing used to help us get to "heaven" and be rewarded. It's a journey, that is for sure, but as you are discovering, that journey holds many joys along with the sadness our life must encounter..I am so happy to know joy is as important as going through sad times.

What I love is that we can change the voices in our heads and we can follow our feelings and live a life that isn't codependent upon anyone.

In fact, what she speaks of is the purest form of codependency. Which breeds lack of trust in self!

Thanks for reading and getting it! I wish you both self-trust and joy!!

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Books, signposts along the way.

  • Annie Rogers: A Shining Affliction: A Story of Harm and Healing in Psychotherapy
  • Elizabeth Gilbert: Big Magic - Creative Living Beyond Fear
  • Brene Brown: Daring Greatly
  • Martha Beck: Leaving the Saints
  • Glennon Doyle Melton: Love Warrior
  • Byron Katie: Loving What Is
  • Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor: My Stroke Of Insight
  • Brene Brown: Rising Strong
  • Patrick J. Carnes Ph.D: The Betrayal Bond
  • Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D.: The Body Keeps Score
  • Alice Miller: The Body Never Lies
  • Dr. Shefalie Tsabary: The Conscious Parent
  • Laura Landgraf: The Fifth Sister- From Victim to Victor
  • Brene Brown: The Gifts of Imperfection
  • Christina Enevoldsen: The Rescued Soul - A writing journey for the Healing of Incest and Family Betrayal
  • Annie Rogers: The Unsayable: The hidden language of trauma
  • Steven Pressfield: The War of Art
  • Alice Miller: Thou Shalt Not Be Aware
  • Rythea Lee: Trauma into Truth - Gutsy Healing and Why Its Worth It
  • Iyanla Vanzant: Trust
  • Rob Bell: Velvet Elvis
  • Norah Vincent: Voluntary Madness- Lost and Found in the Mental Healthcare System
  • Terry L. Wise: Waking Up: Climbing through the Darkness
  • Dr. Karyl McBride: Will I Ever Be Good Enough
  • Shonda Rhimes: Year of Yes

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