Kindness can often mean "Excessive Tolerance" - Danielle La Porte
I love this.
I have felt that I am asked to be tolerant, more than being kind.
Tolerant of behaviors that are hurtful or unkind.
When does one get to decide their own level of tolerance?
Is kindness truly being excessively tolerant?
I have felt that I am unkind, due to my lower levels of tolerance.
I had to look up the definition of Tolerance.
the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.
This is why I sometimes struggle with 'kindness'.
We are asked to ignore the behavior and "be kind", regardless whether we agree with it or not.
It has always seemed like a victim stance to me.
A powerless place to be in.
Being kind can often mean excessive tolerance with bad behavior.
How can we maintain our own integrity and not tolerate something we do not agree with AND, still be kind?
What is kind to poor behavior?
Or, what is healthy and respectful to you?
And even respectful to the one who is doing something wrong?
Is it kind to ignore bad behavior?
Is our kindness dependent upon our tolerance?
If this is so, I am not very kind.
I have a very low tolerance for agreeing with something I disagree with.
A few days ago, I had someone comment on one of my blog posts...and wanted to chat via email; but remain anonymous. My disagreement to chatting with a faceless, nameless person was seen as me having "negative assumptions".
They wanted to place responsibility of our 'lack of communication' on me.
I am the problem, cause I didn't agree with them being faceless; I am unkind.
In my world, I get to decide who and how I communicate.
I may be seen as unkind, but it isn't kind to me to agree when I disagree.