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You are purely truthful. I admire that. You are straightforward and honest and you refuse to be a pretender in order to make everything nice and cozy . How often we give in to people - just to keep the peace or to make everybody think things are rosy. How often we cheat ourselves of inner peace for the sake of someone who never cared enough to do the right thing regarding us. While I don't believe at all in revenge and I know you don't either- I think it is proper , honest and true to walk away from hurtful people and situations.

You are only able to be who you are each day you live beyond your awareness of now and who you can identify as you. There is always loss in detachment or avoidance, but each and every one of us reaches a point that feels clearer or safer, easier or more content or peaceful rather than entering into a circumstance or space we believe is not safe enough or worth enough to put at risk who, what or where we are right now. If I can be true to myself in this manner, I am the only I am responsible for. Keep on taking care of yourself Beth, it is your choice, your responsibility and your consequence. Our lives keep changing as it is so often times we will come to terms with puzzles in our lives a bunch of times....one day at a time is always a comfort to me. Joanie

Thanks ladies for your words. We all live the choices we need to make to be who we are. I am just so much more peaceful being truthful with myself. Perhaps it is age that has me less interested in compromising myself in order to be with someone.

There was a term that Judy shared with me. "Unawakened Parents". There certainly is a cost to the child who is raised by them.

I feel I have the responsibility of living my truth, due to being awakened out of denial/dysfunction etc.
Whereas, perhaps, my mother did not have the chance. I think, if you know, you have a responsibility to respond, even if it isn't the easy path or most liked.

Potential--that nebulous good stuff in the future can cause a lot of pain and concern in the present. If a loss is certain and contained so is the pain associated with it. When the loss is unknown but potentially large, the pain matches it. Continue to build the life you need and want. That life has potential you are in control of and outcomes which are good for you.

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Women In New Directions

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Books, signposts along the way.

  • Annie Rogers: A Shining Affliction: A Story of Harm and Healing in Psychotherapy
  • Elizabeth Gilbert: Big Magic - Creative Living Beyond Fear
  • Brene Brown: Daring Greatly
  • Martha Beck: Leaving the Saints
  • Glennon Doyle Melton: Love Warrior
  • Byron Katie: Loving What Is
  • Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor: My Stroke Of Insight
  • Sheryl Sandberg, Adam Grant: Option B - Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy
  • Brene Brown: Rising Strong
  • Shefali Tsabary: The Awakened Family
  • Patrick J. Carnes Ph.D: The Betrayal Bond
  • Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D.: The Body Keeps Score
  • Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D.: The Body Keeps Score - Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
  • Alice Miller: The Body Never Lies
  • Dr. Shefalie Tsabary: The Conscious Parent
  • Laura Landgraf: The Fifth Sister- From Victim to Victor
  • Brene Brown: The Gifts of Imperfection
  • Christina Enevoldsen: The Rescued Soul - A writing journey for the Healing of Incest and Family Betrayal
  • Annie Rogers: The Unsayable: The hidden language of trauma
  • Steven Pressfield: The War of Art
  • Alice Miller: Thou Shalt Not Be Aware
  • Rythea Lee: Trauma into Truth - Gutsy Healing and Why Its Worth It
  • Iyanla Vanzant: Trust
  • Rob Bell: Velvet Elvis
  • Norah Vincent: Voluntary Madness- Lost and Found in the Mental Healthcare System
  • Terry L. Wise: Waking Up: Climbing through the Darkness
  • Dr. Karyl McBride: Will I Ever Be Good Enough
  • Shonda Rhimes: Year of Yes


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