Who decides it is time to change? Do we? Is there a master plan and we change according to plan? Is it something we have to learn, to practice, or does life happen and changes are required? Required because the landscape we live on has changed. And does the landscape change according to a plan, like the seasons of nature, or are we victims to a mad puppeteer! When you are in the middle of hellhole, a mad puppeteer seems to be the answer. However, once you have experienced the inner changes that have happened due to the long walk through this living hell, you understand that it was all for your benefit. It leaves you then sitting in a state of pure gratitude. Many wise people have used the analogy of caterpillar and the butterfly. And in my experience that is correct. I do feel like I went from being one thing to becoming something totally different, from walking to flying! And I have to believe that I am part of a bigger plan, that the wise Universe is orchestrating all of this, for opportunities were staged for my greatest growth. In the middle of change I was not singing happily or even willingly going along, I went along kicking and screaming inside! I had daily battles with my mind trying in vain to maintain the old me while being shown daily it wouldn’t be possible. Like trying to keep a thousand legs of the caterpillar when only two were needed being a butterfly! We don’t know that we are going to become a butterfly, all we feel is the death of the caterpillar. We are in the midst of great angst, the life is seeping out, and we are dying. Changing from a caterpillar to a butterfly is an inside job. It seems to require our very DNA to change, all our past behaviors are null and void now, and the past becomes the soup inside the cocoon that the butterfly grows from. The caterpillar is gone and we then have to learn to live with less legs and wings. Wings that we have no idea of how to use. And the view of a butterfly sure is much different than that of a caterpillar, it leaves us dizzy with new possibilities. If you sit and ponder the caterpillar becoming a butterfly, it truly is amazing. And if the wise Universe can do that, imagine what it can do for you? I know that it is not up to me to change others, that I am not the magician who can whip the soup to allow a butterfly its wings! I have seen the magic of the Universe at work, I have experienced miracles and seen that I was given the right and perfect tools I needed to get me through each stage. In my world, it was as if this change was pre-ordained and I just went along for the ride. I am still unsure as to why, why me, why was this my lucky lifetime, why did I make butterfly soup? It seems too, that I have been conscious inside the whole while, that I was able to see the old me dying and struggling, while a new me was being born, and I held on desperately to the old one. "I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be." ~ Einstein Maybe all we have to give up is our ideas that we will not change. How about living in a place where nothing remains the same. Isn’t it like expecting a river to not move? Isn’t it like expecting each sunrise to be the same? Give me one thing that doesn’t change? Just one. What remains the same always?
What is unchanging forever?
Be that!
