My laptop lost its way to the Internet, no connection can be found, a wonderful tool that sits in solitary confinement. I can type upon it, but it lost the means to communicate. It felt so odd to have it sitting there without the flow of giving and receiving.
Tomorrow I hope to call the Internet people and reconnect, how easy it is for a machine.
How much harder it is for us. I even have the capabilities to speak and to hear and yet I lost the connection with my family.
Perhaps it is not the connection that is faulty but the words that pass between us.
I say things they don't want to hear and they say things that make no sense to me, it is like we are separated by a language problem.
You wonder where the words come from. From fear or love? Do they know?
Is there a way to fix this and how can it be done?
Who has to change the manner of speaking? Is it me and what do I need to say?
I know it is me, I gave up the language of our childhood and began speaking a new tongue, a new dialogue that is unfamiliar to them, truth.
My new language had me walking a new path, my connections with my family were severed.
I am unsure where there will be the opportunity again to connect.
Until then I walk along learning a new language of me.
