I used to marvel at my husbands ability to move around the planet comfortable in his skin, how his clothing and appearance were secondary always that he seemed to enjoy life without a care.
He wasn’t a participant in the game of looking a certain way, in the contest of having the latest fads, or a living mannequin moving about the planet, he just lived under his own set of rules, being himself.
At times this irritated me, for he didn’t often match the men in a group, but it never seemed to faze him in the least, he arrived for dinner and enjoyed his meal, he got on the boat and enjoyed the ride, he traveled around thoroughly connected to what was, without a barrier between him and what was going on, for he wasn’t concerned how he looked.
This concerning or discerning behavior I had, often times stepped in the way of me relaxing and enjoying myself, for I was so aware of the comparison between me and others, and most often times, me falling short of the mark.
On this trip, I noticed me being much more like him, where I didn’t notice me in the setting, but the setting.
When our cabin didn’t have a hair dryer, I just brushed it and let it go.
In the midst of crowds of people, I was able to move about as me, confident and strong with flat hair, admiring wonderful art, scenic beauty and be totally with my husband, instead of having this drape of not fitting in flapping in front of me obscuring the view!
What freedom lies in just relaxing and facing the world no matter what your outwardly appearance says, inside it says...I feel fine! I am thinking, that we call it peer pressure trying to keep up the pace with others, when it really is mere pressure of being uncomfortable with who you are.
