What has been so extremely enthralling and terrifying is how my mind can see reality totally opposite of how it actually is. How I could live blind of not only what I was doing, but that of others as well. How I could disregard my feelings and believe my thoughts in my head.
Unless, you have woken up to the reality of your own life, this concept will seem completely nuts.
The only thing that truly changed in my world, was my perceptions. Nothing else changed. The people were still acting as they always had, I just could now see them.
It wasn't that my father suddenly turned into a pedophile, instead I suddenly realized that my body was telling the truth. My body's fear was justified.
The only thing that suddenly happened is that I realized that my mind was all messed up.
I stood outside of my mind looking at the way it had created a life for me that wasn't true.
My awareness had reached a new level.
One of the last conversations I had with my mother, she correctly stated, "You and I have two different perceptions of Ray."
Absolutely!
It is amazing that she knew this. And I exclaimed back to her, "Yes, and my perception is that he is a pedophile and in the Houghton County Jail!"
What my mother's mind and mine, could not agree with is, who is the real Ray?
It isn't that reality isn't always there, but that our minds are not allowing us to see it.
My mother's perceptions would not allow her to see him as a pedophile. And that alone doesn't make him NOT one. Yet, in her world she acts like it is so...because her mind is closed to new information. She has her mind made up, and nothing in reality will sway it otherwise.
Standing against my mother, allowed me to stand with reality.
What amazes me is that she believes there ARE two choices in reality....when actually, there is only one. One is the truth, the other is not. There truly can be many perceptions of the truth, but only one of them matches reality.
