S.M.A.R.T. Has another article, "False Allegations of Child Sexual Abuse are Rare"
http://ritualabuse.us/research/false-allegations-of-child-sexual-abuse-by-children-are-rare/
I feel that in society, the numbers are flipped, that the overall sentiment, is that you can't trust a child's words; and that adults lie rarely.
I have even felt the skeptism as I talk about abuse, that the overall push back is that I have to work harder to convince that my words are truthful, that there is an uphill climb to get folks to believe.
And I surely can understand the bend we are trying to unbend.
Using Joe Paterno as an example...it is up to us to go against the legendary status already in place, to take an image of a person and add bits to their reality, which they have worked to keep covered, OR like Joe Paterno, their lives were lived large, the few instances of knowing and doing nothing seemed so small.
I know that it seems incredible that credible people do unimaginable things.
But they do.
In my experience, the image of Pete Torola was like that of Joe Paterno, perhaps he didn't have a statue, instead they built a monstrous church; his castle. His history as being the leader of the church was what we have to take down. He too knew about various stories of sexual abuse and did nothing. Didn't report one to my knowledge. He is remembered as the preacher of the FALC, not as a man who knew and did nothing. I for one would love to see his history reflected in the truth.
This is the push we have to go against, we the children/adult children of sexual abuse...as we are reporting incidences. It isn't that the crime isn't so big, BUT the image of the man we are naming is of epic proportions in comparison to our lives.
Trying to convince my mother, that my experience of her husband, wasn't her experience of her husband, never happened.
The imbalance between the child whose life doesn't carry a long list of legenday acts going up against men who have lives and allies...is a near impossible feat.
I wonder if this is why it typically takes until we are adults to go against the abusers, where we feel the ground is more equal?
What I have felt as an adult coming forth, is that my life has to exemplify the truth impeccably, while the abuser doesn't have to lift a finger to have folks standing in awe of his journey as if it were the complete truth.
My father did not have to defend his history, his wife and children did it for him.
They in turn have me labeled as insane, mental, post traumatic, crazy. Me, for standing by his complete history, with the truth of all the little girls completely intact. I personally have not plea bargained them down to a misdemeanor. I have stood by each girls story and believe them and their innocence and that my father is indeed guilty.
This is reenacted in every court in the land...each time an abused child presses charges.
The abuser is held as innocent UNTIL proven guilty.
Which by default, makes us guilty until he is proven guilty.
The lawyers are all lined up fighting for the innocence of the abuser, while the abused sits guilty...usually watching their truth being chipped away in plea bargain after plea bargain.
In the end, they are left sitting with a partial truth being hung up...a partial truth of their abuser's actions towards them. He isn't allowed to stand in the courtroom with the truthful actions fully displayed, they whittle it down to be so small, until it appears senseless to bring it to trial.
This one act, which isn't allowed to remain in tact, is supposed to change the image of the abuser. How? How when the act isn't even complete by the time the lawyers get done with it?
I don't recall now, what the actual charges my father was actually sentenced with, but they didn't reflect the statement of the Detective. The words of the little girls were not in the courtroom.
What the victims had wrote and the final accusation, was a world apart.
The truth was there, but it wasn't used in the trial.
It is no wonder that the images of these men in the courtroom are seldom changed, for even the judges and the lawyers will not stand with the truth.
Unless like at Penn State, where the sheer numbers of guys coming forth forced the court to act differently. Impossible to go against such numbers. It shows again, how powerful the abusers are. It takes more than one to topple them down.
Which is why I feel that the numbers of abused in the FALC, can and will do the same. Banded together...we can impact the churches stance of innocent.
I once again ask that you call Tom Rosemurgy with information.
