Not only are there humans we shouldn't forgive, but we forgive them at our peril. You forgive them — somebody *else* pays for it. Andrew Vachss
If the churches could grasp this concept and stop selling forgiveness as a cure all and soul saving application.
As well as see its true design of passing on perpetrators to abuse again...we would start to slowly stop the bleed of so many children being abused.
To be fair, not only churches, but well meaning folks too, have suggested, insinuated and wondered, about MY lack of forgiveness towards my father...questioning Me and not the true catch and release form forgiveness is.
Where I am seen and told how cold hearted I am, and not that the application of forgiveness is very cruel to the next child.
How can we get the churches, society to stop selling how 'loving' and 'kind' it is to forgive?
How are they so narrow minded that they can't see into the future when the release the abusers to roam free.
I have felt the social and religious judgement as I refused to play in their idea of forgiveness...when I refused to forget his abusive ways, but instead have been trying to warn others how insane this concept is.
Folks look at churches as benign and loving places for the soul...and fail to see their beliefs at work as they set free abusers upon another child.
IF forgiveness worked, we would be free of all abusers...or most. For this is the first and go to response to abuse.
Very few are actually promoting tearing family apart and ostracizing the abusers away from children...instead their main thrust is to keep it all together, to forgive them their sins.
Who do you think pays when the church forgives these abusers? It certainly isn't the church elders....for the volume of abuse happens to women and children.
If only the churches would at least begin to admit, there are some humans who shouldn't be forgiven.
