As I wrote about the silence of many, it came to me that the group meme affect is what I am up against. It isn't personal or individual but the culture of social, family and religious memes.
Here is the definition of Meme.
"A meme (/ˈmiːm/; meem)[1] is "an idea, behavior, or style that spreads from person to person within a culture."[2] A meme acts as a unit for carrying cultural ideas, symbols, or practices that can be transmitted from one mind to another through writing, speech, gestures, rituals, or other imitable phenomena. Supporters of the concept regard memes as cultural analogues to genes in that they self-replicate, mutate, and respond to selective pressure."
The culture within my family and the church is that of a meme. And, I am sure that I am not exclusive or different, but that we all belong to memes…at one point or another.
What I do feel, is that I am up against group mentality instead of individual ideals.
That the phenomena of this FALC meme as well as the culture of sexually abusing children are my opponents. It isn't personal…or perhaps I can't get to the person, for the Meme is standing between me and them.
"Our world is a place where information can behave like human genes and ideas can replicate, mutate and evolve" James Gleick
What I understand the most is that the meme has to be broken, damaged or doubted. Until then, society will continue to spread these memes…that are detrimental to society.
It is my hope that we can loosen the strings or roots that these memes have in each of us. Perhaps the stigma resides in the meme and not in the individual. Is it possible for us to speak out against what the social and religious memes do to our individuality and or mental state of mind?
When I see others holding back unable to embrace things that go against the meme they are immersed in…I see that there is an invisible prison behind which they stand.
My experience in breaking free of the meme is terrifying and thrilling.
The fear that holds the meme in place is the exact fear you have to move beyond.
And often the love is entangled in the meme's blueprint, where you may gain your freedom but lose the love you had…for the love was very conditional. Again, what keeps the meme going strong is the amount of fear and the withdrawal of love if you are to dare step out beyond its strands.
I get it.
I see it like living in a tangled web of ideals and beliefs laced together with fear.
It isn't even the ideals, but the silken chains of shunning that holds folks prisoner in their own minds.
I have been in relationships where the meme directed each move, where freedom didn't stand a chance…and I have had the great vast unlimited space of being free to be me in relationships. The latter is what love is.
Love is freedom.
As others stand frozen unable to go against the family, church and society…I don't see them as loving the church and family, but rather too afraid to lose their 'love' IF they were to go against the meme.
It has very little do with me…but I pay the consequences of their inability to move.
All victims do.
We are left out to dry while they (church and family members) uphold the sentiments of their group.
This is done subconsciously and mostly without an educated or critical thought. What strikes first, is the fear of losing what they have. They will willingly lose me before they lose their love and faith.
If I can wiggle a few strands free of this messy web that holds abuse as love…I will feel I have accomplished my intention. To rip apart the intricate patterns of the memethat holds abuse within a family like it is not there.
Perhaps the stress of or twist of trying to keep the Meme going when it is in direct opposition of your heart, you will break free. And when you are free of the collective group mind, you will be free to be you.
I love that I know what holds you back, for it was the same for me. The pull on the inside was stronger than any voice outside. Until I saw the what lay inside...
Then the energies reversed.
There is a wall between us...I call it the truth or reality...it leaves us both unwilling to enter the other side.