The internet has given us all opportunities we would not otherwise have, to reconnect and to connect...and I am part of groups within the Facebook community. Some are for Art, some for books and one group is for those of us who have left the church...any branch of the cult like religion we were raised in...and we can offer our experiences.
This group is connected with a blog Extoots, whose owner remains anonymous...and so are most of the respondents who comment on the postings....they go by aliases; fake names in order to speak their truth. I always signed my name, my real name and was fully exposed.
Today, I left the Facebook group...for on the post about my episode with Call Me Mental, the article of my father, 'exposed' the name of the reporter...a church member or ex-member Brad Salmen...and someone connected him with his fake name.
Like someone had opened the door and a face was exposed, the post was then deleted...discussion ensued and blah blah blah.
I had never liked talking to faceless people or to be told the truth, but without a face attached. It just never felt right to me. Although the argument is...that they will slowly show their face, when they are ready...and that it is somehow theraputic to be able to speak EVEN if you can't show your face.
This is where we part ways.
I do not believe that whispering in the dark, in a closet is helpful.
It almost affirms that our past is a dark dirty secret.
Never to see the light of day, and that our truth is something we should never attach to our faces.
It was odd, how when the truth slipped in attached to a face, It was quickly deleted.
That was the wakeup call I needed to exit this group. Like how dare you turn the light on expose who is who and who is saying what on the Extoots blog! I have no desire to go darker...and nameless and faceless and truthless.
That is what the abusers love, for their secrets (victims) to cower in the dark. To keep their secrets secret, to never dare to be fully exposed.
The victim feels it is their truth that is ugly to reveal, when it is actually the truth behind the abusers.
I just can't see there being any good reason not to reveal your name...and your truth. I do know that there are instances of domestic violence where you have to be careful and go through proper channels for your own safety....but on the views of sexual abuse as a child, a nowaday adult will be set free from that closet of shame, once he says his name...when he speaks his truth.
