I had begun a blog about 100 days of Happy, and how I felt that it neglected and put aside all other emotions. After the death of Robin Williams, a comedian, it seems more important than ever that we deal with the darker emotions and become heroes for doing so.
We, society...like happy more than we like sad.
We tend to push aside sad instead of paying attention to it. And, we seldom have challenges that would deal with the darker emotions, but want to play on the spectrum of light.
To me, going about your day and week, only seeking to recognize the light, discounts and denies even, half of who you are. What if we were to have an authentic challenge, where we had to state our feelings, always.
I don't think that the dark side is negative, but honest.
How easily do we deny our emotions when they will expose a truth?
I also think, all our emotions are equal and part of the tools we use to navigate life.
In my life, the rich dark feelings of betrayal, abuse, neglect, denial, to name a few, are what brought me back to reality. They were truthful and I needed their message.
I also believe, that we feel 'flawed' when we fail to be happy or at peace or calm or in control. When in fact, it is much more normal to have a negative response to a negative interaction.
Putting a smiling face on life will not get you a happy life.
To me, a happy life is one where I can fully embrace and welcome all the emotions equally. And to follow their sage advice. They will move you away from things that hurt you...if you listen. This will reap happiness inside; the relationship with your self.
There seems to be a false ideal that happy is a goal for a good life. It is like the word perfect. An impossible reality.
I just feel it is unnatural to ignore half of your emotions...for the dark emotions are time travelers, they will be riding shot gun, even if you never glance their way.
What does it say about us, when we want to ignore the 'negative' emotions?
Where does a person go, when they know, society 'likes' happy better and they are sad? And, worse than sad....depressed. This creates a self perception that we can't engage in life unless we are happy...and so we hide our sad and dark thoughts.
And, is it even possible to maintain a happy...and is it really happy if there are other emotions begging for your attention, but you 'work' to ignore and rise towards something 'more' happy than the nagging emotion marked sad or mad or upset etc.
I just feel that we as a human race have bought the idea that happy is good and sad is bad.
Sad isn't bad.
Sad is a natural response to life when life turns cruel or mean etc.
We need to become comfortable with all the emotions...or lead a life of denial.
I just feel if we were more accepting of our darkness, we would be more accepting of others.
We never try and hide a broken arm, but will put on a fake happy to hide our sorrows.
Somehow we feel that life would become a place of gloom and doom, if we were all real. So, we walk around being fake happy instead of being authentic.
I am hopeful we are beginning the turn toward living more organically emotionally...that the era of denial is going out of style.
I want those whose lives are wrought with dark emotions to be able to expose them and their roots. To show us all the why of their dark emotions...and the how. For depression to be seen like heart disease...when it isn't pushed away and feared.
I see the negative emotions like abused children who are left alone to suffer in silence...in hopes that they will 'change'. We don't. It is my hope that someday sad will be as embraced and sought after as happy. For when we acknowledge our sad emotions, we hear their wisdom and it will change our lives.
It was only by listening to my dark emotions that I had ignored for years, that I was able to fully know me. I was able to fully become me. For most of me was hidden in the emotions I had denied.
Mostly, we don't want to know know know what makes someone sad, especially IF it is in our family. For we don't want to know the truth...cause when you know the truth, and you honor your emotions, you will have to change your actions....your life.
I was not even half alive when I lived in denial. I was more dead than alive. It was by bringing in the darkest of dark emotions and truth that I became whole.
Sad isn't bad...it is where the other half of truth lives.
