"Kicking the drug of Certainty..." was a phrase in Gloria Steinem's book "My Life on the Road".
If you sit down with the concept of certainty, or perhaps your belief in whatever you are certain about, it shuts down anything that is different.
What are you certain of?
How much of your life is open to the unknown and how willing are you to drop your certainty.
I lived a very certain life for 46 years. I found comfort in believing wholeheartedly in things I put certainty upon. I wouldn't have called it a drug; but I totally relied upon being certain. Being certain IS where the value lay in the church.
Certain that it was the only church heading towards heaven.
Certain that it was the only right religion.
Certain in the power of forgiveness of sins.
Certain of the morals and values of its members.
Certain that my mother held high morals and high values...I could trust her to do what was right; always.
Certainty lived outside of me. I just had to believe in those certainties.
My inner constitution and support leaned heavily upon these certainties.
I based my life upon these certainties.
I saw life from this certain position.
If there was any doubts about these things...it was often my lack of faith in them. But, certainly not them.
I can now see how a child is schooled into believing upon certainty...and the things that his parents are certain about become his. We are given this drug at a very early age and base our knowledge of the world from this vantage point.
We live comfortable with a certain set of certainties that keep our world upright.
If and when, these certainties are challenged...we are challenged.
I didn't have a separate independent self that saw the world; I saw from the collective opinions of others that schooled me.
Perhaps what made me more faithful upon these ideals, was the lack of my own.
I have been pondering the Faithful Women of the FALC and what if anything I can say or do; to rattle their certainty.
It absolutely appears that they are drugged by certainty....and unable to make conscious choices or to move freely.
This is astounding to me and also very affirming of my first 46 years on the planet.
When Gloria speaks about "Reproductive Freedom" it is much broader than the right to abortions. It is the right to your sexual organs.
The women of the church are certain that they have no rights where their reproductive organs are concerned. It isn't theirs.
What this means is that someone else owns them.
They don't have the right to protest or stand up for them.
This is just one point they are certain on...and have given that right away.
Again, it appears they were given this drug slowly insidiously from a very young age until now they are dependent upon it.
Their certainty needs this...in order for their lives to make sense.
My coming in and trying to shake their certainty...is a withdrawal from what they have known.
They will have to now become 'uncertain' and that feels powerless....EVEN though they have lived without the rights to their own bodies...being uncertain leaves them in fear.
They have been powerless but did not know it. Their only power was in being certain.
When I take away their certainty; they are left with nothing.
Their loyalties lie with those who want them to remain powerless.
And, they turn away from me. Become silent.
The only way you can become so certain, is to be taught these ideals at a young age; to be raised in this culture and segregated from the outside. Or as Martha Beck says, "Born in captivity."
There are a few things that appear to be quite certain.
That as long as the church members willingly hold on to their certainties and remain unmoved by evil in their midst....evil with flourish.
As long as women give up their rights to their own bodies; they are not free...and are powerless.
If the very doorway to their femininity isn't theirs...how can they celebrate being feminine.
I looked up the word "Femininity"
"the quality of being female; womanliness. "She celebrates her femininity by wearing make-up and high heels."
How do the women of the church celebrate their own feminine natures; when they are unable to even own their reproductive organs, let alone the freedom to wear make up and decorate themselves etc?
Are they certain about giving up their rights?
If they have given up their rights; how will they be able to champion the rights of their own children?
Do you not have to be free before you can try and free another?
Can you be two free birds in the same cage certainty?
A certainty that you see as worthy, and it sees you worthless.
Can the worthless wretched souls...save anyone?
When, in fact...they can't even save themselves.
