While listening to Dr. Peter Holmes, this came up in a discussion about losing weight or exercising more.
"The first thing is to not do anything, do not diet"
"The first thing to do is to maybe sit down and ask yourself, What eating that food symbolizes for you? If you find yourself eating a lot or eating unhealthy food, is that a way for you to cover over anxiety or depression or loneliness. Begin to ask if there is some meaning to that activity."
"So, you don't try to fix it, don't try to do anything with it, you just listen to it."
"What might happen. Let's take a fictional example. Somebody feels they are eating unhealthy and they are not exercising. And by thinking about it, they realize actually that's something they were taught when they were kids. When they were really young, their mother or father, or their school, they had this idea that they had to look a certain way, and they had to be thin or whatever. And, then they realize that voice isn't my voice. I have internalized an external voice. That is step one, they realize Oh, that's not me that wants to get fit and go on a diet, that is an internal voice of some other."
"But, then the second step, is they realize actually they are protesting against the voice unconsciously. So the fact they are eating a lot of unhealthy stuff and not looking after their bodies is actually a protest against that voice. They are actually protesting legitimately against something that is bad. Which is this voice trying force them to do something good."
"So, then what you do in the third stage is to exorcise the voice. Get rid of it. Try to get rid of that voice. Now here is the really interesting bit. If you are able to get rid of that internal voice that's telling you to exercise more and be healthier and not eat bad stuff. You also get rid of the protest, that fights against that voice, that stops you from eating healthfully and stops you from exercising."
"So actually you find that you are much more able to eat better and to exercise. So you get rid of the very voice that is telling you to exercise and eat well, and actually that helps you exercise and eat well. And that is what is called grace by the way. Grace is where you realize you do not have to do anything. And in not having to do anything, you exorcise the voice, that tells you have to do it and therefore you are able to change." Peter Holmes
I found this idea extremely insightful and helpful. For it appears that we as adults should know better, in what is best for our bodies, but it does seem like we are in active protest against ourselves. But, what if, we are actually in legitimate protest against our early teachers?
What if, it isn't about us at all?
But, we are just protesting unaware.
What I love more is that if you can get rid of that old belief or voice, your protest will die as well. There will be nothing to rise against if the voice is gone.
So, it isn't about exercising or dieting but about exorcising a voice that isn't ours. One that we rail against.
The voices in our minds, that want us to move and eat better, is more the problem.
My life has been built upon protest much more than what I personally want for myself.
I have spent more time in protest than I have in doing what my own voice wants for me.
Who is my other internal voice that I am protesting and what is it saying?
Is it a society voice and expectation that cute girls are skinny.
That you are bad if you don't eat well.
How very interesting to see the thing we actively protest against.
And, how we are legit protestors!
So, then...when I do get out, is there a deeper part of me that feels I have joined the team of the internal 'other voice'? A betrayal against Me the Protestor?
I truly love, that it isn't about the food or the activity; but rather about the dual between two inner voices. Mine and the external voices of culture and rearing.
It will take the untwisting or releasing of the other voice...and the protest dies.
This makes most sense in the battle of diets and lazy being.
It has nothing to do with taste, control, or how we move in life.
Instead it is our very valiant effort to protest!
What a good protestor I have been!
I will now be asking who am I protesting against and then release that voice into the ethers!
If I no longer believe that voice, there is nothing to protest over.
I love that there was actually a legitimate reason for what I was doing.
A protest seems better than just being out of control.
I am going to rid the voices and free myself from the act of protesting.
