Shafali Tsabary's new book, "The Awakened Family" has what she calls
"The Mandate of the Awakened Family."
The time for a new beginning has arrived,
Where family is no longer the chain that binds us
But is the earth from which we blossom
And the sky we learn to fly.
No matter how the family unit looks,
It begins with a parent and child.
A relationship that holds the energy of the sun,
With the power to break patterns and resurrect the spirit.
The awakened family waits for no one,
It begins to heal right here, right now.
It recognizes that these sacred bonds
Can revolutionize the planet.
"We awaken when we become aware of who we truly are. This awareness brings a realization of how liberating it is to be authentic - to be real, instead of who we think we are supposed to be or who others want us to be. Once we have connected with our sovereign spirit, creating the space for our children to get in touch with their own spirit becomes the critical objective of parenthood. Committed to the manifestation of the true self in each member of the family, the awakened family paves the way for children to own, discover, and express their inner voice, through which they foster connectivity with both their own being and that of others. Cognizant that this right to express their own spirit is the key ingredient for they present and future resilience and empowerment, they become a part of the global evolution of a world built on compassion and nonviolence and prosperity."
"An awakened parent is one who is aware that the traditional paradigms of parenting, where the parent is seen as a greater than the child, are obsolete in the modern world, producing dysfunction and disconnection in families. Instead, they are willing to be the architects of a new model of parenthood where parent and child are seen as equal, serving as mutual partners on a path of growth founded on increasing consciousness."
"In an awaked family, parents are aware that every relationship in their family exists to help each person grow. Parents view their children as mirrors through which they are able to see how they themselves need to mature and develop. Instead of fixing what they see as faults in their children, these parents seek to work on themselves, raising their own levels of maturity and presence. The focus is always on the parent's awareness rather than the child's behavior. This is the core insight of the book."
"When parents are aware in the present moment, learning and growing alongside their children, the entire family thrives. Free to actualize their individual destiny, each family member lives unencumbered and unafraid. Empowered with self-awareness, boundless in self-belief, liberated in self-expression, each feels free to explore, discover, and manifest their authentic being. The is the mandate of the awakened family." Dr. Shafali
What she writes about in this book is true in my experience.
Once I began working on myself and becoming authentic, my children became my equals.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who has children. And, even for those of us who are the awakened ones within families, to see why it is we couldn't stay.
I could literally quote the whole book here on the blog!
She writes -
"...When children aren't given the space to assert their authentic voice, but are drowned out by the roar of parental agendas, they grow up anxious and depressed. Many of our young people who are so deprived of our acceptance - of simply being seen for who they are - that they self-harm in a variety of ways. Getting drunk, taking drugs, engaging in inappropriate sexual relations, even cutting themselves - all of these are cries for our acceptance. They are manifestations of a deep wantinging to be seen, validated, and known."
What I love about this book, is that she does allow you to look at your parents and to see why it is that we had to become inauthentic in order to survive. But, she also knows the remedy for it now. How children are actually here to help us return to our authenticity IF you are willing to present and awakened.
In fact, she calls the children "Awakeners".
I love these paragraphs too.
"To exercise domination over our children is a huge temptation for our ego, which loves to feel powerful and in control. Can we really blame it, when it was raised in an autocratic manner and is now addicted to it? After all, who else allows us near-total control over their life? You cannot do it at work. Or with your parents or siblings or friends. Often, your ego thinks the only relationship you can have complete control over is the one with your child. That's why it tries so hard to exert it. Only with our children do we get to be all-knowing, controlling, dictatorial. If we only realized how this kind of control is actually indicative of a weak sense of inner power, we might reconsider our ways."
"When we ignore the immature ways we sometimes behave toward our children, which they consistently reflect back to us, we turn down one of the most profound opportunities to grow ourselves up. If on the other hand we embrace the mirroring of our immaturity that our children offer us, we have a chance to become profoundly altered. The most ordinary, everyday, interactions with them in even the tiniest matters then become a catalyst for change." Dr.Shefali
What I love the most, is that we are always directed back to our self, for change.
It isn't about what the child is doing; but our reaction and response to it...or even that we are the cause for poor behavior.
If a parent can choose to be an awakened one and truly see their child as the awakener, your life will change in brilliant ways.
It will not be easy; but it will be completely and utterly worthwhile; a journey of a lifetime.
I have traveled this.
Lived it and am living it.
And, I know that my view of my children changed completely.
To literally be able to see them without the filters of my past and societal expectations, but to see them as they are, is so huge.
They owe me nothing.
They don't need to become anything for me.
There is nothing wrong with them; but perhaps an untold number of things wrong with me and the way I parent.
Each day, as we move along together, IF I can remain present or struggle back to presence, our family will always benefit. Always!
This book has the power to transform each dysfunctional family legacy that many of us have been raised beneath.
When parents awaken, our world will change. This can be the most beautiful legacy you leave your children!
Imagine a world where children are known as the awakeners!
Who come to show us back to the spirit of who we are.
