When hanging up ornaments with my granddaughter, we excitedly found our favorites. She loved one that was handmade by a friend of mine. I love the ones with pictures of the kids when they were young. I also love the ones my husband has given me and my children. I love the ones that represent what I love. I love the ones I have purchased on our travels - each old memories.
Many of the ornaments are not expensive - yet they are so valuable in the moments of my life that are meaningful.
Our tree memories begin with our married life.
Thirty four years of Christmas trees, and a Manger.
I no longer put up the Manger I received from my brother. Our silence for the past 6 years left it cold.
It is interesting to me how our relationships get instilled into 'things'.
Their meaning means more - or less.
Christmas is a feeling.
Love is our Christmas tradition.
My body or soul feels at peace with the items I have chosen to put out at Christmas.
It would be odd to me to have items from those I am estranged from.
I don't know what to do with the Manger - it holds memories of the good times too - when our children were young. I received the Manger before I was married.
I wonder if there is a way to separate the feelings from the object.
Can new emotions and memories overlay the cold feelings.
Will enough time pass where it can be displayed without the memories of our silence?
The weirdest or most awkward part of estrangement are the things I used to love.
I don't know how to keep the love - and not feel the absence.
And, the Manger also holds religious tones.
I don't know what to do with them either.
The story, the tale, the sermons, the feelings of worthlessness, the one and only, the weird forgiveness notions, like a fairytale of manipulation and control.
I believe in love.
Love that doesn't need forgiveness.
Love that is kind, pure and whole or wholly of you.
I guess it is best the Manger stays in the barn another year.
For it is imbued with so much meaning, that means less to me.
Love is on display again this Christmas.
Decorations of love on our Christmas Tree.
