Wow, 63 feels like a seminal moment - a stage of life that begins something new.
A ending that is up against a new beginning.
I will be ending my work career in about 42 days; but who is counting.
That is the official end; but I will be done sooner than that with vacation time taking me to the finish line.
63 is where most of life has been lived - but where more free time awaits.
Facing 'old' age is real and yet a second childhood appears on the horizon.
The senior childhood comes with lots of perks - which I plan to use in the early years of this childhood.
63 brings home the reality of health and perhaps the lack thereof.
Or, the necessity to enjoy each healthy day we have.
To luxuriate in the simple pleasures of moving.
The old adage of move it or lose it comes to mind. I am grateful that I began moving a few years back and returned to things I loved in my youth.
I am so grateful that I have stocked my garage with toys for my second childhood.
And, even more grateful for the badass women I have the privilege to call my friends.
Oh the fun that awaits me.
I could focus on the short end of the stick I am living on, OR on making the most of the least amount of time.
It almost feels like really living is what retirement is about.
Where you have unlimited time to do what you want each day.
Okay, I hear the rebuttals out there but it is my hope that I can fill my day with more
joy and love then I have while working.
I am also happy that I was able to incorporate fun while working. That my shorter shifts allowed for plenty of play. Even IF I had to work 6 days a week, I tried to squeeze in playtimes.
My intentions for the years to come is to make the most of my health, my family and friends, and what I love to do.
There are things we all have to adjust to as we age, and we can either take them with grace and acceptance or lament at what we no longer can do. Perhaps if we focus on what we can do - the things we can't do will fade away and be good memories - but not daily unhappiness.
I want to be a well adjusted old lady.
One who continues to be comfortable with unwanted changes.
To find humor and joy in the newness of being 'older'.
I know I am an age denier.
I haven't felt really old yet.
Perhaps retirement will make me feel old.
But honestly, I am a young girl inside of this older lady's body.
I can chuckle at the incongruent dance we have.
I do fear being incapable or unable to take care of myself.
Or of even losing my mind. Normal age fears - I would say.
I guess I am going to live in this second childhood - embracing my young spirit and live like I wasn't old.
Oh, and another fun thing us older folks can do is not care. And, we can enjoy being freely ourselves and not worry about what other say. We have the ticket to be weird or eccentric - old ladies can pretty much get away with anything.
We are similar to the toddlers who are so delightful and yet get in trouble - the ones who you can't help but cheer as they are on another escapade of discovery and mayhem.
It does feel sorta the same, on the adventures we sometimes take; where the adventure is a tad above our abilities. Yet in those moments - we grow our confidence.
Maybe my retirement will be for growing my confidence.
I am hopeful, and would be so grateful to have years of adventures ahead.
I am ready to downshift into retirement - Let's get day 42 rolling!
